The problems we face in relationships are a reflection of the relationships we experienced in our early infancy and childhood. When our relationship needs are not met for example love, touch, nurturing etc, when appropriate bonding with a loving and caring supportive caregiver is absent, the freedom to explore and grow independently is not available and there is little or no protection from harm, we move into non-coherent relationship patterns.
These patterns are survival patterns and strategies in an attempt to feel better about oneself and to try and meet the needs that are not being provided. During this critical time, we can become complex human beings. The mind becomes a minefield. Remembering we are the egg and the sperm (there is no getting away from the fact that we are our parents make up) so we carry the DNA of our parents all of their coherent and non coherent parts combined with our survival.
Without a loving caring caregiver to help us through these times, meet our needs for love care attention, model coherent behaviours, teach us strategies for dealing with the world, we continue with these self taught and non coherent modelled ways of being and behaviours throughout our lifetime, believing these to be correct, and these become our familiar way of being – until one day, we may realize that our outside world is not working the way we envisaged it to be, relationships fail, or we don’t have the relationships that we want, love seems to elude us and we find peace by saying it’s just not meant to be. The real love of relationships does exist and is there for the taking.
- Learn about the non coherent patterns and strategies of early childhood
- Learn how to identify your own non coherent patterns
- Learn key life skills in how to change these patterns
- Learn how to communicate more effectively in a relationship setting
- How do you attract the love you want in your life
- Key skills for mastering this love and generating more in your life